I need some space, really, some place where nobody knows me and I can be alone for that few days where I can enjoy some serenity...Where I can walk around by me and myself.No, I not troubled or anything just that I want some romance with myself in a foreign land where coffee shops line the street and people spend their day lazing around, and walking around with no destination in mind and no purpose.

Do people take you from granted? Its kinda irony that the people whom you care most about will take you for granted but you will take for granted the people who care about you.

boring friday afternoon...haha...but i like the peace and quiet of the day...if only some things can get solved...

So many had happened lately, whether it is in work, love(?). Wait, love? Do I even had one? sighs.

What doesn't change are my friends who are always there for me. I always act like I bullying them but I just tough on the mouth soft in the heart. But now, all of us are having a tough time, some of us are having love issues, unreciprocated love actually, while the others are very very stressed about their school work.

Hmm, lately there had been many misunderstandings about me and frankly speaking, i quite pissed by that. I always thought that in this world, there would be people who will look deeper into others and not just on the surface. But what you present to others will determine what others think of you.

Perhaps, I expect too much of others, to see the real me when I always wear an unconventional hairstyle, jokes around anything and pokes fun of people.

Work had been very tiring lately for me also. I always wondered why some guys can afford the time to be around their girlfriends all the time. Don't they have things to do?

It is certainty a tough period for me now...Perhaps I grown soft due to my easy student life.

Positive traits

1. Silent worker
2. forward looking
3. loyal
4. Pride
5. adaptable
6. able to take charge and plan(sometimes)
7. Not afraid to admit any mistakes
8. Can be fun and serious
9. Can work even if in a very very very bad mood, It hard to drown myself in misery
10. responsible

Hmmm, like very weird,singing praises of myself. Haha...

My shortcomings

1. Tends to do everything very fast
2. Fails and fails but I will just keep doing it...Don't know when to give up
3. Inconfident
4. Give people impression that I am not serious and very frivalous
5. Always hoped but always get disappointed - too optimistic
6. Take it hard on myself whenever anything went wrong
7. Jealousy
8. Bossy
9. Tendency to go out of my comfort shell, I know the solution but refuse to use it if it is not "me"
10. Believe in human will rather than heaven's - making my life miserable

I miss the time when I was a kid. Things were so much simpler and I could cry freely. Problems encountered recently have no solutions other than running...I seems to have everything yet nothing.

Birthday wish - I wish I can be stupidier and ignorant of other's perception.

New phrase

It officially my first day of the holiday and yup, I feel that I had entered another new phrase of my life. New things to consider, new challenges, new outlook, new people and old people that I am considering changing the kind of relationship with them. And I have cleared my room for the 3rd? time this year. And honestly, after like 3hours, the before and after look the same. Sigh.
It is funny but I actually hunting for something to buy, to play with to keep me occupied but I have already have enough things to do and appointment at hand to last me until school starts. In fact, I do not even know if I have enough time to finish all my tasks...
There are like a dozen things in my mind right now. I hope they can get sorted out by this friday, well, at least 1 or 2 would be really nice for me.
But deep down, I know taht I am the same old me...tsk tsk

Happy Birthday!!!

My brother turn 16 today. It feels like yesterday when I went to the hospital to fetch him and he pooed as I carry him in my arms on the taxi. I actually glad to be 8 yrs older than him cause I feel that it is because of this that we do not quarrel as much as other brothers. In fact, I do not recall us having any disagreement over anything at all in my memory. Either this is true or it is that my memory is failing me again.

Three days of reflection

Some words from one of the fellow trainee...

When do you know when to stop giving?
Give to the extent until you feel pain. When you start to feel pain when giving to the students, it is a sign for you to stop. Cause giving more would not generate anything good anymore.
Take a step back and hold the rest for the others who may deserve it more or need it more.

阿郎的故事

I do not know how many times I had watch this movie but it still have the power to bring tears to my eyes. I almost drop my tears. Mum, cried again for the, I don't know how many times. This is what I defined as a good movie. It is not so much about love. It is about a family.
All the recent idol drama, love story with two good looking idols on the screen always try to be pitiful while maintaining their hair, pimpleless face and those nice and expensive looking clothes. Did anyone realized that theses people could afford to take a cab everywhere, buy really nice shoes, don a nice jacket when they supposingly could only get a pay of $800 or less per month? The worst is when Dawn Yeo in their previous 9pm drama said that she only had $20 left for two weeks and she could 1)take a cab everywhere, 2)Get a pair of canvas shoes from converse 3)Have enough to eat, 4)Come out from a day of work being a chef without any smudge on her mascara and not a strand of hair out of place. How that for an idol?
No really, why can't these people be more "real" than "reel". Their so called sad and tragic love story are sooooo not tragic. Lost in love or forsaking a huge family fortune for love or working hard all day long is not, to me, things that are sad.I mean, what is so sad about all these stuff? Of course, there are a lot of really sad love stories out there but just not the recent ones.
BTW,Iron Man is GOOD.watch it.

少林少女

Shaolin fist is the utimate fist there is...That is why, this movie is also going to be the utimate one...少林少女!!! That the cheesy lines by the commentor in the opening of this trailer. Now showing in theaters all around................Japan. Damn it.


Kou Shibasaki from Dororo, ssinking of japan as the strongest Shaolin female fist,
Kitty zhang yuqi - teacher from CJ 7 as Taiji girl
chi chung lam - aka qing gong flow on water in shaolin soccer
Kai man tin - aka tei bu shan in shaolin soccer
Yosuke Eguchi -Dr Satomi in white ivory tower

p/s:video taken from youtube...

Branding

It's kinda of funny...I been branded by my friends in contradicting ways...One group of my friends say I am goody goody boy, while the other group say I am too beng...Other thinks that I am very lazy while some think I am quite hardworking...When I had centre parting last time, Kxxxxx says I am very beng. I keep side parting, wxxxxx says I am very beng. Now, I had almost no hair and txxx find that beng.WTF
Perhaps, I have been giving people the wrong message and protraying the wrong image, not that I purposely want to anyway. No matter how busy I am or how much work or effort I put in a task, I would not ever say it out like some what people did. I do not really know why some people like to always say, I been very busy lately blah blah blah cause I am doing blah blah blah...Or things like, I need to do this so that I can blah blah blah or you must blah blah blah.
My guess is that people like to protray to others the image that they are hardworking, guai guai and so on. I find this very "untasteful". Giving out an image that is more socially acceptable to society masks one "real" self. There will be one day when people can find the real you, then what happens?
Maybe it is due to this, that I tend to "protray" myself some notches lower than who I am. Cause if you can tolerate or even like, the "lousier" me, there is a higher chance of you liking the "real me".
Why is it that one have to prove to others that they are "dilligently" living out their life? Why is it that people tend to rate others at their face value. I guess that people just want to follow the rules of the society to be accepted but the rules or norm of the society are set by us, right?
Some also think that I am very carefree or heck care cause I always the joker around. To speak the truth, I joke only because I can't find anyone to entertain me enough. Have you ever went out in a group where it is so boring because everyone is just so quiet, unfun and tends to speak among their themselves leaving the few others to die by themselves. I joke in order to bring the whole group together so that everyone can have fun and I branded as a "clown" or someone who speaks rubbish. And sadly, it had become my habit.
No, I am not complaining, just whining...

Bumbling BEEs

Wing Gundam Ver.Ka